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Arne Duncan Assembles â??Team of Sycophantsâ??

by EdTweak

Demonstrating a ground-breaking reading of
President Lincolnâ??s "Team of Rivals" strategy,
Arne Duncan, the appointee for Secretary of
Education in the new Obama administration,
has been busily assembling a Team of

After briefly considering the idea of placing a
diversity of experts in top positions, Duncan
concluded that everything would go much
more smoothly if everyone devoutly adhered
to the same strict ideology. "Disagreements
among our staff could potentially lead us to
re-think conclusions weâ??re already reached,
which would be very inefficient," Duncan

The new leaders, meanwhile, have been
wonderfully effusive in their flattery of one
another. "Itâ??s incredible how all of Shaun
Janurâ??s ideas are magnificent," applauded
Cindy Whopp. "He's a true visionary, the way
he understands the need to open up school
staffing and preparation to marketplace

"But he has nothing on Alisyn Ralli,"
responded Randy Amsterdam. "She truly
understands how important it is to continue the
Bush administration's emphasis on testing and

Of course, they all agreed that the true
luminary is Arne Duncan himself. As for
Duncan, he rejected the 'team of sycophants'
designation. "I prefer 'cult of partisans,'" he
told us.

— EdTweak
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