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Duncan Launches T-Shirt Campaign at CTB McGraw-Hill

Another item in the news you will read nowhere else.

Monterey, CA-- Sources close to Harold McGraw III confirmed Tuesday that Secretary of Education Arne Duncan gave the keynote address at a ceremony inducting new standardized test item writers today at CTB McGraw-Hill headquarters in Monterey, California.

Commending the work-for-hire hotshots for their contributions to educating future workers for a global economy workforce, Duncan said, "I wanted to see first-hand the interesting hallucinogenic effects surrounding standardized test preparation," he said.

Duncan expressed the nation's gratitude for test item writer efforts in raising the bar on students in Arizona (AIMS), California (CELDT), Colorado (CSAP) (CELA), District of Columbia (DC-CAS), Department of Defense (DoDEA), Georgia (CRCT), Florida (FCAT), Mississippi (MSGLTP), Missouri (MAP), NY (NYS-3-8), North Dakota (NDSA).

Duncan said, "I get a buzz just thinking about it." Then, in a more somber vein, Duncan said, "But I challenge you to join the fight all America is calling for: We must turn around schools by raising the bar higher. Beef up those distractor items!"

Duncan concluded his remarks by handing out souvenir T-shirts: Race to the Top: There are no good schools without good tests!

— staff



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