in the collection
Pooh's Little Instruction Book for Teachers
Lesson Plans
If possible, try to find a way to write your Common Core Lesson Plans that doesn't involve going bump, bump, bump, on the back of your head.
Or send a knife into your heart
When waking in the morning, if your first thought is, "I wonder what's going to happen exciting today?" it's unlikely you'll find it in your Plan Book.
The most important clue to successful Lesson Plans is Never Take Them Too Seriously--leave room for excitement.
Remember: The Bird in the Window only happens for teachers able to take advantage of it.
The trick to succeeding in the classroom is to recognize the moment when you need to let those Plans drop.
And smile when it happens.
Never write in your Plans that you're going to practice a special Outdoor Song which Has To Be Sung In the Snow.
It's important to sing these songs. Just don't issue warnings in your Planbook.
When you've been following your Lesson Plan for miles, and you suddenly stop for breath and a student says, "Do you want to hear why the chicken crossed the road?" then you know it's a Friendly Day.
If you plant an acorn, it will grow up into an oaktree. But it doesn't follow that writing The students will. . . in your Planbook means they will grow into 21st Century Workers.
If you want to make your Lesson Plan more hummy, add a few chicken riddles. Or Elephant Jokes.
Sometimes a Lesson Plan is a Lesson Plan, and sometimes it's more of an Accident. It depends on whether you're on top of it or underneath it.
Don't underestimate the value of Planning Nothing, of just going along, listening to all the things in the room and humming along.
If the Lesson Plan was fine today, it doesn't mean anything. It may hail a good deal tomorrow--blizzards and whatnot.
Evaluators-Carrying-Rubrics
Something about the way Evaluators-Carrying-Rubrics say "Good Morning" tends to leave one's ears full of sand.
When speaking to an Evaluator-Carrying-Rubrics of Very Little Brain, remember that talk of pedagogy will put her on edge.
Try not to fall asleep during professional development presentations. It annoys Evaluators-Carrying-Rubrics who consider themselves Very Important People.
When conversing with Evaluators-Carrying-Rubrics, remember that they think it is rather beneath their dignity to talk of Teachable Moments or even Why the chicken crossed the road.
You may think Evaluators-Carrying-Rubrics don't have brains. In fact, it is very likely they are part of a Mind Control Experiment being conducted by the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation.
If the Evaluator-Carrying-Rubrics you are talking to doesn't appear to be listening, be patient. It may simply be that she is waiting for an important signal from Bill Gates.
If the Evaluator-Carrying-Rubrics asks you the source of a particular item in your Lesson Plan, and you don't know, it's safer say, "I got it out of Danielson" than to refer to Piaget or Dewey. Or Abbie Hoffman.
Eeyore was likely talking about Evaluators-Carrying-Rubrics when he said, "We can't all, and some of us don't. That's all there is to it."
Students
It's always useful to know where a student is, whether you want him there or whether you don't.
Don't forget that a kid isn't a Consumer or a Client or even a 21st Century Worker. He is likely someone who can be cheered by a balloon--or a chicken riddle.
Just because a student is obnoxious, it doesn't mean he doesn't need kindness. . . just as much as the sweet teacher-pleasers.
When your off-the-grid students are wedged in gloom, try reading aloud--choose a book off the Common Core grid.
— Susan Ohanian
2012-01-22
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