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Resume of the NCLB Leader

George Bush's resume

[From a list compiled by Kelley Kramer and published by Buzzflash]

PAST WORK EXPERIENCE

Ran for congress and lost.

Bought an oil company, but couldn't find any oil in Texas, company went bankrupt shortly after I sold all my stock.

Bought the Texas Rangers baseball team in a sweetheart deal that took land using tax-payer money. Biggest move: Traded Sammy Sosa to the Chicago White Sox.

With father's help (and his name) was elected Governor of Texas.

Became president after losing the popular vote by over 500,000 votes, with the help of my father's appointments to the Supreme Court.

Attacked and took over two countries.

Shattered record for biggest annual deficit in history.

Set economic record for most private bankruptcies filed in any 12 month period.

First year in office set the all-time record for most days on vacation by any president in US history.

Set the record for most campaign fund-raising trips than any other president in US history.

Cut unemployment benefits for more out of work Americans than any president in US history.

Set the all-time record for most foreclosures in a 12 month period.

Appointed more convicted criminals to administration positions than any president in US history.

Set the record for the least amount of press conferences than any president since the advent of television.

Signed more laws and executive orders amending the Constitution than any president in US history.

Dissolved more international treaties than any president in US history.

First president in US history to unilaterally attack a sovereign nation against the will of the United Nations and the world community.

REFERENCES

All records of my tenure as governor of Texas have been spirited away to my father's library, sealed in secrecy and un-available for public view.

All records of any SEC investigations into my insider trading or bankrupt companies are sealed in secrecy and un-available for public view.

All minutes of meetings for any public corporation I served on the board are sealed in secrecy and un-available for public view.

— Kelley Kramer
George Bush's Resume
Buzzflash.com
http://www.buzzflash.com/contributors/03/04/23_resume.html
May 1, 2003


INDEX OF THE EGGPLANT


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